Like the ikShvAku-s bound by the rakShas,
like bhIma neutralized by the cast of dice,
like rAma stopped by the lord of the armies,
like abhimanyu felled by the kuru hosts,
within us were diversely oscillating pistons,
we lay as an engine unable to engage the wheels.
We dodged the strike of the agent of skanda,
twice skipped entry into the abode of the asura,
then came out of the realm of the sylvan durgA,
thereafter back-hurled the vile, gripping kR^ityA,
But was this all just to fall like a common man,
in the manner truly detested by kShatriya-s
Eight are the cremation grounds, the mahAshmashAna-s:
chaNDogra in the eastern reaches of the va~Nga-s,
yamajvAla where the sea laps the draMiDa shores,
varuNakapAla where the Anarta-s have their drinks,
kuberabhairava where one learns mahAlIlAdevI’s teachings,
shrInAyaka, outside which the andhra-s flock to brothels,
aTTahAsa, wherein cherikA-s are possessed by bhUta-s,
ghorAndhakAra, from beneath which hi~NgulA prances,
And kilikilArava where the gargantuan ape was killed.
We only vaguely knew of the shmashAna-s, not their names or locations. Then we ascended to the stronghold of upasha~Nkushiras where he was relaxing with his dUtI barbarIkA. We asked what had befallen mahAsha~Nkushiras. His face turned pale. He then pointed to the west and said: “there he is roasting away on a pyre at varuNakapAla”. The amAtya and shachiva wanted to hide from us or play down the end of mahAsha~Nkushiras. But we were not to be fooled. It struck a cord somewhere deep within us: could it be that we follow him on that way? The lesser brAhmaNa in our retinue said that we should go and meet vAtulashiras. So we went there with our retinue . We heard from his beautiful daughter kShetrA that vAtulashiras had been possessed by a DAvI. The looks of kShetrA bewitched us; we wanted to linger in her company, reading comics, and our retinue was more than happy to oblige. We soon learned she was accomplished in more ways than her looks despite living in the midst of mUDha-s and praduShTa-s and kShetrA of her own tried to make conversation with us. She was telling us that she was intent on performing a six year sAdhana to relieve her father of the DAvI. We intently listened to her plans, all the while snatching glimpses of her face. But right then our most trusted alter ego signaled to us, pointing to two mating cats, which were screaming in an orgiastic climax just beyond the hedge which surrounded kShetrA’s house. We were awakened like matsyendra in kadalIrAjya by gorakSha. Leaving the amAtya and the lesser brAhmaNa to deal with kShetrA we rushed out with our alter ego. The cats continued their engagement, their cries reverberating through the afternoon quiet. Our alter ego said that the DAvI had probably seized both of us even as we had been enamored by kShetrA. We left the place without even saying bye to kShetrA.
We returned home and at the evening hour with our alter ego left towards the rocky massif of vAyava. In our mind we were repeatedly turning the issue of the end of mahAsha~Nkushiras. We reached the great vaTa-vR^ikSha that sprawled like a forest in itself. There we mentally worshiped indra that he may raise us, the Arya, above our dasyu foemen. We wondered what is that befell mahAsha~Nkushiras: how could he be killed while being so well-versed in his lore. We wondered why was it that he fell much like the great agnimanthin before him. What was the chink in his armor? We sat there with our alter ego thinking if such an end might befall both of us. Just then tura~NgA came by running covering the whole length of the ground that lay in from of us in less than a minute as was usual of her. She said: “Those great yoddha-s are all puffed up with pride about their preparation and are eagerly awaiting battle. It seems only you and me are here not doing anything serious. You just sitting and staring idly with your alter ego beside you, and me trying to increase my athleticism.” Still thinking about mahAsha~Nkushiras roasting away on the pyre we absentmindedly asked her: “Are you trying participate in some race.” She: “Yes, do you not know I am the fastest.” We: “May be somebody will be faster in the actual race.” She: “But they will not be prettier than me.” That made us look up more closely at tura~NgA. We had to generally agree with her self-assessment and this induced us to spend more time with her. So we asked our alter ego to proceed home and left the shade of the great vaTa vR^ikSha to hang out with tura~NgA. She said: “Let us go to check out what the puffed up yoddha-s are doing in the sabha and figure out where we stand vis-a-vis them.”
There samastasena stood up and said: “Alien brAhmaNa! If you are really a brAhmaNa like us then tell us what would be the period of water oscillating in this U-tube.” We struggled for some time but failed. Then sphichChiras stood up and said: “sqrt(tan(x))dx iti shritasya ko .anukalaH? api tasya dx/(1+x^4) iti shritasyaanukalena saha sambandhaH ?”. We struggled for some time and failed again.
Pleased with our failure they asked: “O nAma-mAtra brAhmaNa! Can you ask us anything that we would not know?” We: “Why does cyclooctatetraene behave like and acid and what is the salt it would form with KOH?”. The yoddha-s struggled for sometime and fell silent. Thus, we had at least managed a draw in the j~nAnodaya. It struck us then that we should not be draining our time in tura~NgA’s moha and instead seek to emulate Odin in drinking from Mimir’s well.
We then reached that well of the great drink in the year of pramoda. We drew up the drink and were about to consume it like the warrior dashadyu drinking soma for we were to head to the great war like the one where the varashikhas were consumed. Then much to our consternation and pleasure the three pretty girls kShetrA, tura~NgA and tantunAbhikA appeared beside. We were momentarily distracted for not one but all three stood beside us, before whom there was hardly a man who would not be imprisoned by the shR^i~Nkhala of kAma, much as the mysterious danava imprisoned by gaNendra. We felt like placing aside our cup and conjoining with them in sa~Ngha hoping to enjoy pleasures such as those enjoyed by the deva of the deva-s in maithuna with the bewitching asura kanyA viliste~NgA. At that point the brightest of the three tantunAbhikA who shone like a trikA devI standing on a bhairava spoke forth: “If you really wish to enjoy our sa~Ngha you need to exhibit skills of a yoddha. I know you have conquered many of my UrNapaTa-s but mastery of the lUtikA-s is not enough. You need to conquer the mighty ratha and the koSha.” We smiled for with the cup of the elixir we knew it was hardly a difficult thing for us. The sachiva said just drink a sip and mount the ratha which we have ready here – all will be accomplished with that. We marveled at the forethought of sachiva and how he had kept the ratha ready. But just then braindeya appeared on the scene and said: “O bhArgava this elixir is like the gift of indra to the sUtaputra – you can drink it only once. Like rAdheya having to either slay ghaTotkacha or arjuna you can either drink it to enjoy the company of these girls or you may drink it and become the yoddha you desire to be. It was by trying to drink twice did mahAsha~Nkushiras and agnimanthin attain their ends.” Just then the amAtya shouted: “do not fear, you can drink twice.” Since braindeya had already drunk his sip we feared he could be right and remained cautious. We chose not to pursue the women and drank for victory in the other wars. Now we felt like bhImasena after emerging from drinking the juice at vAsuki’s lair. The battles piled on quick and hard shortly thereafter. In first of the encounters that followed samastasena rushed at us like an invincible droNa but like vR^ikodara we overthrew him after a close combat. Then we hurled the dreaded sphichChiras from his ratha and he was crushed by his own wheels.
It seemed the elixir was taking us where we wished to be. Years latter, tantunAbhikA came back to us and asked us to go with her. We thought that was great idea and embarked on what was a long journey. We first moved a little west and settled in the cave at puShpakedAra. There for long we stayed subsisting on two meals and a beverage for the day. Indeed they say:
He who eats once is a tyAgin;
He who eats twice is a yogin;
He who eats thrice is a bhogin;
And he who eats four times a day
is verily destined to be a rogin!
Thus, we resided in that cusp between the yogin and the bhogin. Avoiding contact with society, except for the necessities of commerce and for the rare gaNachakra-s with the inner circle, we spent the hours in contemplation and discourse. Our objects of contemplation were there great words we discovered in that truly voluminous and seemingly never-ending tantra of the great tiraskariNI. On the first few days we explored for ourselves the van der Pol equation in the form:
dx/dt = y
dy/dt = b*(1 – x^2)*y – x
Where b is a constant.
On all those nights we gazed southwards at the dog of rudra. Hence, the shruti says: “ArdrayA rudraH prathamAnam eti |” To the south of the dog near the edge of the Milky Way we saw a little asterism. A little to its north lay RS Puppis. We kept watching it night after night as long as we could, a star so bright that it shone at Mv= -6.09. We thought of the halcyon days of yore when our first telescope caught its first light in Perseus. Turning to the north we spent time gazing at the nebulosity of M76 and thereafter in what may be called the connection to the gods of M81.
One day we awoke from a bad dream. “What was it?” tantunAbhikA asked.
It was a large hall but with not much sunlight despite it being the middle of the day. There were vague faces all around us, much like hazy figures king yudhiShThira might have seen in course of his Stygian sojourn. Of those, we only recognized tantunAbhikA veiled by a considerable haze.
There as paper of coarse consistency before us. On it were scrawled the desha-bhAShA words which included among other things:
nimnalikhita muhAvaro.n se vAkya banAo-
vIra-gati ko prApta honA
TUTa-fUTakara-ronA
Dhera ho jAnA …
Sitting in that hall we started making sentences such as:
apabhraMsha kI patrikA se laDate hue haM vIra-gati ko prApta hue |
apabhraMsha kI bhayAnaka patrikA ko dekhakar hamArA puruShatva miTa gayA aura haM TUTa-fUTakara-rone lage |
apabhraMsha se ghora Thokara khAke haM vahI.n Dhera ho gaye |
tantunAbhikA laughed and went to the sprawling book shelf to pick a dusty volume termed the “muhAvarA aura kahAvata saMgraha”. As she was leafing through it a Mongolian pop song played in a loop in the background. We felt a strange sensation – not something which could be described in words – it combined the fear put into the Iranians by the ancient god Pan (Arya: puShaN) with the awe of the same god experienced by the Greeks during their great clash. Even as we watched the tantunAbhikA receded into the background even as a wisp of spider web and vanished.
A yakShiNI dIrghanidrArati appeared from beyond the haze and said:
Some find rest by going home,
Some find rest on the bed,
Some find rest in a woman,
But for some there is no rest,
except that which death brings.
Continued…
Filed under: Life
